The Sex Conversation

making out  Kayla:  ” So my mom, goes freaking ballistic. She read some of my texts on MY PHONE while I was in the shower. Holy shit. She read these texts that basically, well, she found out I’d had sex with three different guys in the last two months.  It’s no big deal but she went crazy and took my phone and my computer and the tv out of my room. I’m grounded for like a month.

And my dad, I don’t even know what his deal is. He won’t even look at me, much less talk. It’s like I’m not even in the room. Mom said he’s just too heartbroken. Whatever. It’s not like I’m pregnant or a hooker down on Park Avenue. I swear they are making such a big damn deal out of this.”

“And when I told Mom it was like that Lady GaGa song “Do What You Want With My Body” that’s when she really flipped the bitch switch.”

“I told her it was like that part of the song where it says,

“You can’t have my heart

And you won’t use my mind but

Do what you want (with my body)

Do what you want with my body

You can’t stop my voice cause

You don’t own my life but

Do what you want (with my body)

It’s crazy how mad she got, I mean she totally freaked out and started breaking stuff. I love her but she totally doesn’t get it. She doesn’t get that this is my body, mine, and I can do what ever I want to do with it. and it’s no big damn deal who I have sex with, it doesn’t mean anything and it’s not her business.

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Her Mom: Oh my Lord. Kayla  didn’t even deny sleeping with these boys. She just said it was no big deal. Like it’s just throw away sex. She has no idea she’s giving away a piece of herself, a big piece of her soul that she’ll never get back. It does mean something, whether she knows it or not. But hell, she’s just fifteen she doesn’t’ know a lot of things. But I thought she understood this. This!

You know if I found out she was sleeping with her boyfriend I’d be upset and disappointed and sad and heartbroken but this is different. Three different boys in two months. They aren’t even dating, just “hookin’ up”.  She actually said, “Mom, lots of guys just hit it and quit it”. I didn’t even know what the hell she was talking about at first. The “it” is her, my precious baby girl is just an “it” in her own mind. A thing, that guys hit then walk away from.

She thinks having sex with boys she doesn’t even know will some how make her happy or popular and it’ll just make her feel worse and empty.  It’s empty…she’ll be empty.

And then she starting telling me about some Lady GaGa song, quoting the lyrics, saying she was just like that and I lost my mind.

Something about “do what you want with my body”. How come they get to do what they want to my baby but I can’t. I just want her to be safe and wonderful and beautiful. How is it she doesn’t understand that her body and mind and heart are all connected. All the parts of her are beautiful and mean a great deal.

How have I failed her. How is it I didn’t impart to her the beautify of her own body.

I’m just lost.

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A Boy: Yeah, Kayla and I hung out. A couple of weeks ago I gave her a ride home from school. We get out of school at 3:20 and her mom works till 5:00. So we went to her house and were watching tv. We were messing around and she gave it up. It was awesome. She likes doing it but it wasn’t like a big deal or anything. A guy in my chemistry class told me about her and she’s pretty cute.

I’d never taker her out or anything like that. I’m talking to this one girl, and besides, Kayla’s not like that. She’s not that kind of girl. But I’ll give her a ride home anytime.