Almost The Sweetest Valentine…Ever

There seem to be two kinds of women in America, 1. Those who hate Valentine’s day; they think it’s a commercial ruse that inflicts ridiculously high expectations. Lots of women boycott the holiday on principal.

2. Then there are those who buy in and go hard. Their men must spend at least a hundred dollars on candy, flowers, food and cards or he clearly “doesn’t love or appreciate you enough.”

Both ideas are kind of dumb and unnecessarily harsh. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with a holiday that encourages love. But taking a second mortgage out on the house to prove our love seems kinda moronic too.

Yesterday, after being “together” and married for 25 years, I think, Alex got it absolutely right.

First, there was a scribbled note on half a sheet of notebook paper next to the coffee pot.  All it said was, “Will you be my Valentine?” Nice! And there were two Hershey kisses. Perfect, he remembered the day! Pretty immature and adorable. Well done sir!

When I got home there were daffodils he’d picked in a vase and he fixed dinner! I’m trying to lose weight on the low carb diet right now and he took that into consideration…steak and lobster while we watched a new episode of The Big Bang Theory. Killed it.

But the best part of this Valentine’s Day? He changed the sheets on our bed…all on his own…without me asking. I woke up in the middle of the night and thought about how great those sheets felt as he snored next to me like a jacked up Harley Davidson.

Thank you Alex. You get a 10 out of 10 this year!

Our First Date….A Hot Springs History Lesson

alex and me (2)Alex and I met in 1991 or 92.  I’d just started The Springs Magazine and he was a hot shot young chef in Hot Springs. I turned him down a couple of times cause he was a player then finally relented.

Back then Alex was a stud, lean (he’d been a swimmer at Michigan State) long curly black hair and lots of black chest hair. He was swarthy and smooth.

I relented and said yes to date.  I remember I was wearing a short black gauzy dress, it was mid-summer and so hot.  We went to Brewskies on Ouachita Avenue first. Mike Stanley was playing with Danny Smith and I realized Hot Springs had amazing blues.

Then we drove in separate cars to the restaurant cause I was being cautious.We met at The Majestic, an old restaurant, not really cool, but he was a chef and seemed to know what he was doing. We sat in the first booth, closest to the door, under the thick floral curtains.

majesticI thought it was incredibly cool when Alex left me and walked right into the kitchen to talk to his friend Butch, who was running things that night.

He ordered some kind of smoked trout dip as an appetizer. I don’t remember the rest of the meal. but our waitress knew Alex and was obviously flirting. He was really handsome.

After dinner we walked out and he stood in front of me looking so hot. I thought he was going to kiss me. Instead he reached into his jacket pocket and handed me something wrapped in a napkin.

It was a quartz crystal, three points and incredibly clear.

He said, “I collect them. I found that one in Mt. Ida.”

Oooookay.

Then I waited, smiling, thinking he would lean in and kiss me.

But he didn’t. Instead he walked around and opened the door of my Toyota. I climbed in, waited, then drove away thinking. ‘Either he doesn’t dig me or he’s a total weirdo.”

Twenty something years latter we’re sitting here watching The Big Bang Theory waiting to pick up child number four from Taekwondo. We’re good.

So next time you drive past the burned out remains of the Majestic Hotel remember some great romances were born there with reasonable women and handsome weirdos.

 

How to Win Your Woman’s Heart…Trick Her

usDriving through Hot Springs this morning I started thinking about my husband, Alex….and the night he won me over. Most men have an opening line they use to pick up women. But Alex’s was so ridiculously sincere and immature that it worked.

Twenty years ago Alex was the chef at a Mexican restaurant in a cool old building on Ouachita Avenue.  He was always flirting and asking me out but I ignored him. At that time he was pretty hot,  (that’s sounds bad, he’s still ha handsome man) he had a swimmers body and long black ringlets. Lots of women in town were after him so I figured he was a player and just laughed him off.

One night I was on a date with a landscape architect from North Carolina. Of course we went to Alex’s restaurant, Acapulco’s. My date was sweet but boring and hopelessly in love with me. So he was trying way too hard. Yuck.

When he got up to go to the bathroom Alex blew out of the kitchen, walked right up to my table and said, “What the hell? I saw you first.”

He was so adorable I had to laugh. And we talked until my date came back. He made the mistake of asking Alex where we should go for an after dinner drink.

Alex told him we had to go to “Edelweiss “. It’s now the Brau Haus (and sadly about to close) . The restaurant is in Spencer’s Corner a wonderful historic brick building in Hot Springs. (It used to house a brothel called The Piggly).

Of course by the time we got to Edelweiss Alex was already there, waiting for us. Smiling smugly. It was over for the landscape architect.

So men, this Valentines day be creative, be persistent, manipulative, cunning, deceptive and immature. You’ll win her heart for sure.