When Jack was a little boy he was beautiful, soft spoken, kind and gentle. He wasn’t shy or weak but he was so sweet and loving. Jack was so sweet in fact, Alex started wondering if he was gay.
Sometimes he cried when his dad beat him in basket ball. Jack was the little boy who tried to take care of everybody, especially his sister Mary and a hopeless mamas boy. We couldn’t have asked for a more wonderful son but seemed to lack in natural aggression.
We constantly wondered if the world would eat him up. We worried that he would get picked on, girls wouldn’t like him, and the universe would just steam roll our son because he was too nice and gentel.
Alex had a tough childhood, and was literally afraid for Jack. We tried to figure out how to make him tougher, for his own good. But it was hopeless. Jack was a sweet heart.
When he tried to play sports he just couldn’t find that part of himself that wanted to beat other people down. Jack wanted everybody to win and be happy. When a pee-wee foot ball coach yelled at him on the field and said, “Don’t you every want to hit somebody Jack, just put them down?”
Jack shook his head, “No, not really.”
The coach nodded, “Go sit on the bench.”
When I look at Jack now, I can still see and feel that gentle and soft little boy. But he’s not the same person. He’s a different creature. He’s a big swarthy, tatted up musician. I listen to his CD, yikes, he’s a bad ass. He sings about whiskey, and guns and he takes his shirt off while he plays drums. Sometimes he gets so worked up while he’s on stage he ends up performing in his boxers. When he performs, beautiful hot girls crawl all over him…even though he’s standing with his mother! Seriously.
Jack is a bouncer in a big city rock and roll bar. He called yesterday to tell me he had to break up a fight, “Well,” he said, “I just yanked one dude off the other then threw them both out.” Yes, he’s got a degree in French and film, but he really loves a good fight.
Kids change. The brat turns into a wonderful teen aged girl. The ugly boy grows into a handsome man. The laziest kid finds something he wants to work for. So you can’t ever give up on them.
Jack is still a smiling, sweet mamas boy, he’s still a family man. But the little boy who cried playing basket ball with his dad hasn’t been seen in a long, long time.
I love you, Jack!
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