Your Dad Is Not An Idiot

family without richardDad’s are in a very tough place right not and it’s really not fair.

In the 50s, 60s and 70s dads in America knew their place and their job. It was pretty black and white, even on tv.  Dad’s were the bread winners, the wise men with a steady hand. Their job was to support the family.  Look at tv dads from that era. Leave it to Beaver had Ward, there was Andy Griffith, in the 70s Mike Brady was the voice of reason and a money making architect and Howard Cunningham on Happy Days was steadfast rock the family could count on.

Now tv fathers are bumbling idiots. they are laughable in their ineptness. The dads in Modern Family, Blackish and Fresh Off The Boat are morons and mom always has to clean up their mess.And dads today are expected to be kind of metro-sexual pansies in order to be effective caring parents.  Well that’s not fair.

It’s true, studies and my life experience have show a woman’s work day is on average three hours longer than a dad’s because after we get home we do the majority of the cooking, cleaning and child care. But those numbers are shifting. Now that I work and Alex stays home there has been a 100 percent flip in our house and I have to be careful that I don’t over look his hard work.

Today is Father’s Day. Appreciate the dad and husband he is. Moms need to stop allowing the kids to be disrespectful to their dads. Make your girls stop their eye rolling. Maybe your dad doesn’t know much about texting or PMs on facebook, but he knows other stuff, that’s a lot more valuable.

Don’t get mad at him when he’s trying to protect you. He’s only doing that because he loves you so much. And an over protective dad is a whole lot better than one that’s not there or simply doesn’t care.

Listen to your dad, and watch  what he does.  Men sometimes speak a different language.  They may not say “I love you” all the time but they show up in the middle of the night to change flat tires and they sit through endless band concerts.

Today, give the old man a break, a hug and let him have the tv clicker all day without richard

Dads and Daughters…Who Has the Power?

dadDads out there, you have no idea how powerful you are.  If you have a daughter please know she adores you, she admires you , she worships you and she needs your attention, desperately.  This is true if your baby girl is 2 or 20.

You are the first man she will fall in love with. If you are there for her she probably won’t need an actual boyfriend until she’s in her teens.  If you  tell her she’s pretty and wonderful and smart, she won’t need conformation from a stinky boy for a long time.

If you are a cold  uncaring jerk, if you argue with your daughter constantly and criticize everything she does, she’ll probably find a boyfriend  who fills the gaps you leave before she leaves the school play ground.  Little girls need a man in their life who makes them feel special.  If you don’t do it they will find somebody  who will.

So dads, man up, do your job, hold her hand and tell her how lovely she is. Start when she’s young and you’ll save yourself from a boat load of heart ache and late night worry.

Now, I want to make one point very clear. I’m not telling all you guys to spoil your daughters…rotten. Spoil them with love and attention but not with crap and stuff.  If you buy her a I phone when she’s 7, a new Play Station every month when she’s 10 and a brand new car when she turns 16 YOU ARE AN IDIOT and SETTING HER UP FOR MISERY.  If you spoil her with “stuff” two things will happen.

She will equate love with money and merchandise and she will expect every man she meets and likes to buy her everything she wants. Don’t wreck her life like that, please.

You probably need to consider this too.  If you want your daughter to date and fall in love with good men who treat her with respect, treat her like a lady you should consider how you treat your wife or girl friend. If you’re a jack-ass who yells and screams at your woman, if you are rude, mean and ugly. If you’re a lazy deadbeat, your daughter will probably end up with a dude just like you. You’re telling her how women should be treated.

The  first time a boy friend screams at her or God forbid, slaps her, she will respond one of two ways.  She’ll get out of the car, cry and cry then forgive the guy and take him back. Or she’ll get out of the car, tell the guy if he ever lays a hand on her again she’ll rip his fingers off and eat them and never talk to him again.

How will your daughter respond? It’s on you, that’s how much power father’s have.


Stupid Ass Stuff My Dad Said

Back by semi-popular demand this is a reprint and because I think it’s really funny. Also I’m reprinting this one because my brother, who says some of the most &%$#*@ up stuff in the world,  is in the hospital. Goodnews though, yesterday he started calling the nurses “darlin'”  so I know he’ll be ok.

*%$#* my dad and brother said.
Yeah, William Shatner has a bad show and he’s a pain in the *$%  who says messed up &!)*, but I think we all have fathers with ridiculous ideas.
My dad, I Granger McDaniel, was a genius, a visionary, a war hero, but he said some *^@% up stuff.
I remember when I was a little girl, sitting at the table with my mom, dad and brothers,I started picking at my food, pushing the peas under the bread, because I was full and didn’t want to eat anymore. My mother told me I had to eat the rest of my dinner and Dad interrupted her , “Don’t make the girls clean their plates, the fat ones are hard to get married off”. Serisoulsy…he said that out loud.

When I was four, I sat on Dad’s lap, played with his massive mustache and told him an epic story about bears and trolls and the fairies who lived in my underwear drawer. He laughed, shook his head and said, “Little girls, as soon as they can open their eyes they can flirt, as soon as they can open their mouths they can lie”. This was during the sixties when sexism was pretty white bread.

I Granger said some other absurd and brilliant things too, but maybe the two most important comments were a lot easier to follow. My two favorites were, “On any given day, anything can happen”. Think about it. That one is as right as rain. Miricles do happen, unbeatable teams loose, sometimes losers and long shots win. Anything is possible on any given day.

And finally, he would sit on the edge of my bed every night and remind me, “When your imagination accepts it as reality, it will inevitably become the truth”. For crazy people and little girls that’s a powerful mantra. It makes you brave no matter how enormous the enemy; it allows you to dream and believe the best can and will happen. That phrase allowed me to keep faith and hope alive, no matter how disastrous the situation. Obviously, those are re-phrased biblical ideas. My father wanted me to believe, to have faith and to see that everything is possible.

I hang on to my father’s words, all of them, the good and the bad, and too this day, I never ever clean my plate.