I was going to write about my daughter Mary, who taught her cat to poop in the toilet. I’ll do that later.
Tonight my husband, was cleaning his office, and he suddenly held up a bumper sticker. BE NICE!
It was my BE NICE! bumper sticker. Oh my lord. Twenty years ago when Alex and I were dating I somehow convinced him we could be bumper sticker moguls. I thought if we printed 5000 BE NICE and MEAN PEOPLE SUCK bumper stickers we would become crazy rich. He still thought I was hot and brilliant so he paid for the first printing.
Silly man. The MEAN PEOPLE SUCK stickers sold pretty well but nobody wanted the BE NICE ones. Apparently there were a lot more sarcastic bitter people in Hot Springs, Arkansas than hippies. I was crushed.
But those bumper stickers have become an important part of our marriage, they represent something I can’t explain. BE NICE explains Hampoland, the way we’ve raised our children and what we try to do every day. When one of the kids acts like a little puke, we say BE NICE. When Mary gets really really frustrated with jack, she says, BE NICE.
Those two words can end any argument or snarky situation in our house. Cause what do you say after somebody simply tells you to Be Nice?
“You look like a rino today.”
“Your dog smells like a dead monkey.”
‘Your mother is as sharp as a bowling ball.”
“Omg Be Nice.”
See, it works every time.
I think this all started with my brother Granger. I believe he’s the one that gave me the idea.
So, I still have almost two thousand bumper stickers if anybody wants one. And tomorrow, no matter what happens, remember to BE NICE.