Adults, you don’t need to read this cause you already know the answers. Kids, I thought I’d throw you a bone and tell you just a few of the things that really make your parents mad. These aren’t the things that make us slam doors repeatedly, scream and break our favorite coffee mugs. These are the little things that make us sigh loudly, and lock our bedroom door because we don’t want to look at you.
When we ask you to water the plants, the cat and the dog in the morning. We text you a reminder in the afternoon then come home from work to find you asleep on the couch. The cat, the dog and the plants are all dead, shriveled up from lack of water. That actually happened. One of my kids had a parakeet and we watched it fall off this roost in the cage. Birds need water. We buried it’s colorful little body in the yard.
We really hate when we buy you nice new shoes and you smash down the back part and wear them like clogs. Seriously, you’re so lazy you can’t put your shoes on all the way? Those are the shoes you “really really wanted”, so I paid sixty bucks for them, knowing you would outgrow them in a few months. Now they are clogs. Damn it, that pisses me off.
Sometimes we know you are rolling your eyes at us and thinking “what ever” in you mind. but we just can’t catch you doing it. But we know, we can feel it deep in our bones, what you are saying and doing.
Here’s one that really makes us crazy. I tell you he seems like a good guy when he asks you out and you say “he’s just a friend, and he’s way too nice.” Then you date some dumb ass misogynistic jerk who breaks your heart. Or boys, I tell you she’s a manipulative sleaze and you are completely surprised when you find out she’s been going out with the entire offensive line behind your back.
This happens all the time. You ask to stay over with a friend. You tell me, “if you’ll let me I’ll help you with all that yard work when I get home.” But you stay up till 4am at your friends house, then come home and immediately fall into a death like sleep on the couch.
It’s my fault because I spoil you, but when I wash your clothes, make a nice neat stack and tell you to put them away, then find them behind your bed, on the floor or worse. I want to light myself on fire when I tell you to clean up your room and you just throw the clean clothes into a hamper and I find them, still folded, waiting to be washed again.
And then there are the obvious ones. We buy you new clothes but you still wear the old worn out stuff that’s stained and makes you look like you live in a box under a bridge. There are the days we fix a really nice dinner, your favorite in fact, but you filled up on a Cheetos and Hot Pockets, so you don’t eat anything.
So, there you have it boys and girls, a partial list of the stuff you do that really pisses parents off. Now that you know, maybe you’ll stop. Or, perhaps you already know how bat poop crazy you’re making us. Perhaps you’re trying to make us insane so you can put us away. Then’ll you’ll stay up all night, eating Hot Pockets, rolling your eyes and killing all my plants.