My Boy….A Champion and A Loser

sandor josephSandor, my ten year old son has had a string of tough losses at taekwondo tournaments.  His big sister walks away with enormous gold trophies and he leaves with nothing.  Sandor trains hard, he does what his instructors tell him, he’s respectful and always has a great attitude….but he loses. It’s been heartbreaking.

After the last high profile loss I was almost speechless. Sandor came unglued as only a little boy can.  He sobbed on my shoulder and once I got him in the car he got mad, he screamed “I’m sick of losing!” We both screamed with the windows down “This Sucks.”  When we got back to the hotel we ate chocolate and Cheetos, drank Mt. Dew and jumped on the hotel beds.  After that he was just fine.
While my son was crying on my shoulder I tried to hold back my tears as I whispered into his ear, “Your day is coming, I promise you ….your day is coming. If you have the guts to stick this dry streak out, if you have the patience and strength not to quit….your day is coming. I just don’t know when it’s gonna get here. But it’s coming….I promise you buddy.”,

I let Sandor skip the next couple of Taekwondo classes because I didn’t want him to get burned out, but on Wednesday night he said, “Hey Mom, what time is class?”  When I told him it was in thirty minutes he immediately ran off to find his uniform.

After class I asked Sandor how class was and he said, “Awesome!”

The next night after class I asked him how things went and he said “Amazing.” Then I told him there was a tournament the following weekend. We could skip it or we could go, it was up to him.

Sandor stared at me like I was an idiot, then he gave me the “duh” shoulder shrug . “Mom, my day is coming, what if next Saturday is “my day” and I don’t show up. That would totally suck.”

“Yeah, ok, you’re right.  I’ll get you signed up tomorrow.”

A few days later he asked me about a friend of his who boxes. He’s talented but didn’t win much his first year.

“Is he going to box next year?” Sandor asked.

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure he is.”

“Good, cause his day is probably coming.”

I think he’s right.

The next day I started thinking about Sandor and his faith. His day IS coming. I know that for a fact . I don’t have any doubt. And I will hang in there with him until it happens.

I know instinctively Sandor will succeed, will be a champion…if he doesn’t quit.

So, until then,  I’ll stand ringside….knowing my son’s day is coming and he has the guts to wait then embrace it.

3 thoughts on “My Boy….A Champion and A Loser”

  1. The greatest lesson standing between ourselves and our dreams is the ability to persevere. There are many highly educated people that are not successful. There are tons of very talented people that are broken hearten because it never happened for them. There are millions of privileged people that squander they advantage because they simply gave up to soon. I believe that this is one of the most important secrets to obtaining what ever it is you want from life. Work hard, work smart and never give up.


  2. There is so much truth in his article. We do have dry spells but must still keep our eyes on the goal and forget ahead. Sometimes our job is to be that encouraging word to younger souls. We are all teachers, leaders, and students “trimultaneusly” ! Yes, I just created a new word! Kudos to Sandor. His day is coming. Kudos to Mom on that front and on her own.

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