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Posts Tagged ‘fat pants’

Evil Catfish And Wal-Mart Scooters

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New Years is just a belt- notch  away so it’s time for a “fat blog”. This is made easier because I live in Arkansas and we are one of 14 states that make up the American “Stroke Ally”.

 That’s right. If you live in Arkansas you are nearly 30 percent more likely to have a stroke, doesn’t matter if you are black or white. What does matter, they think, is how much freaking  fried catfish we eat.  (I need some more tartar sauce with that,please.)  So our beloved catfish, the meat without feet, is killing us. And it’s been going on since 1962.  Apparently,  the catfish have been working on this plan for a while. 

Last week, while in Walgreens I saw The Ultimate Foot Washer, (as seen on tv)  and the box  said, “so you never have to bend over again”.  Seriously, bending over is something we now avoid? OMG, our ancestors were bending over all the time right up until they died. They picked up roots and babies, rocks to throw at dinosaurs and grub worms for their stew. But we don’t want to bend over to wash our feet. What he hell is going on here? It’s no wonder Wal-Mart has had to double their fleet of “fat people store scooters”.

So, it’s almost the New Year. You are making resolutions, please add bending over to wash your own feet to that list. And keep an eye on that catfish. He’s a thinker.

*Thanks for reading and I hope you have a great New Year. DH